Storyline: Batman RIP: Miracle on Crime Alley
Date: August 13, 2008
Price: $2.99
Writer: Grant Morrison
Artists: Tony Daniel and Sandu Florea, cover by Alex Ross, and variant cover by Tony Daniel

Synopsis: “Batman R.I.P.” - Part 4! Robin and Damian team up - yes, you read that right - to search for the missing Batman. Meanwhile, the Club of Villains - The Hunchback, Pierrot Lunaire, King Kraken, Charlie Caligula, Scorpiana and El Sombrero - rampage through Gotham City! This incredible fourth chapter of “Batman R.I.P.” ends with the surprising return of a character you never thought!

Opinion: Well, here we go again … Grant Morrison is just as crazy as ever, so let’s try to make sense of this (warning: spoilers!) Zur-En-Arrh pandemonium—right after the jump.

The last time we saw Batman in his own title was when he had just donned a new suit (a “technicolor dreamcoat,” according to Harvey Dent, heh), declaring himself the Batman of Zur-En-Arrh.

Now, with Bat-Mite on his shoulder, Batman’s officially nuts. He’s talking differently, acting ruthless (and wielding a weapon that looks like a baseball bat—excuse the pun, ugh), and is either paranoid, delusional, and hallucinating or something really DID happen to him. What exactly am I talking about? Well, after Batman tracks down some Club of Villains henchmen and finds out about Le Bossu (French for “The Hunchback,” a member of the Club), he starts talking to Gotham City’s gargoyles.

Uh, yeah.

Batman, at least, acknowledges just how crazy that is when he asks Bat-Mite, “Am I nuts or did these things just talk?”

“You? Oh, you’re totally sane,” Bat-Mite answers. Hmm …

The gargoyles show him something they call the Grid.

“Of course,” Batman says after he sees the Grid for the first time. “Birnley, Newtown, Jerold—the streets where Batman was born. A checkerboard. A blueprint, a machine designed to make Batman.”

Heh, what? Yeah, it kind of makes sense (in a crazy way) if you think about it metaphorically/abstractly, but it’s still weird.

We get a glimpse of what sounds like paranoia when Bat-Mite tells Batman, “Now would be a really good time to find the most recent scar on your body and deal with the tracking device. Let’s just hope they didn’t hide it in one of your teeth!”

Okay, that clearly screams paranoid delusions, right? Well, you’d think so. But there actually WAS a tracking device in Batman’s tooth. What the hell did the Club and Dr. Hurt do to him?

Afterwards, Bruce takes off the costume (he’s still pushing around that darn cart his drug-induced hallucination friend Honor Jackson gave him in the previous issue) and cleans up in the run-down public bathroom of the theater on Crime Alley.

He asks Bat-Mite, “Did … Did something happen to my mind, old chum? It seems so much … faster now. Clearer. Simpler. Like a streamlined engine, a silver bullet …”

Bat-Mite helps ease Bruce’s amnesia, explaining the situation to him and why the Club of Villains and Doctor Hurt are going to get more than they ever asked for. “… Doc Hurt got the idea to use ‘Zur-en-arrh’ as a hypnotic trigger phrase that would give him the power to switch off Batman any time he wanted. But it doesn’t pay to underestimate Batman, does it? Batman thinks of everything. Batman even prepared for psychological attack with a backup identity, remember? He made a secret self to save him. The Batman of Zur-en-arrh.”

Is Bat-Mite telling the truth? Is Batman “totally sane,” and has he somehow been strengthened by Zur-En-Arrh? Or has Batman completely lost it like Robin (Tim Drake) thinks. Is he paranoid, delusional, and out of control—or is there something else going on entirely?

Speaking of Robin … Like the issue synopsis says, he has teamed up with Damian—Batman and Talia Al Ghul’s son. There’s a quick scene in which two characters—Cyril and Percy Sheldrake—receive a voicemail from Robin, asking for help. I honestly have no idea what’s going on there, so let’s just skip it and move on. ;D

Next we see Charlie Caligula and King Kraken—members of the Club of Villains—question Bambino, who was there when Batman found the tracking device and ambushed the goons that were on to him. Batman soon shows up, which freaks Charlie out (hehe).

Meanwhile, at Wayne Manor none other than Commissioner Jim Gordon waits at the gate. “What took you so long, Alfred?” he asks over the intercom as the butler finally releases the gate.

Alfred, of course, has been beaten and tied up by Doctor Hurt and the Black Glove.

Gordon and another officer walk in; the other cop gets caught in a trap—the whole mansion has been boobytrapped by El Sombrero.

In the Batcave, Hurt reveals that Arkham Asylum is the next step in his plan, and he’s counting on Charlie to squeal and tell Batman everything—luring him into Hurt’s trap. Also, Hurt has promised Robin to the Joker—who we now know is in on the Black Glove organization—but Pierrot Lunaire and Springheeled Jack lost him.

“Must try harder, boys,” Hurt tells them. “And don’t be too long. We’re breaking the Batman at midnight.”

We switch back to Batman interrogating Charlie. Bats shows him the Bat-Radia. Now, we saw Bruce with this in the previous issue, but something’s different this time around.

“It’s a #&$@ cheap radio!” Charlie exclaims. “You’re nuts! You’re crazier than all of us!”

Well, he has a damn good point, now doesn’t he? What we see this time around isn’t a cool gadget from Zur-En-Arrh. Instead we see what Batman’s really holding through the eyes of Charlie: a worn-out AM/FM radio.

At any rate, Batman realizes Charlie’s only acting as bait. Can Batman outsmart the Black Glove and Doctor Hurt and find Jezebel Jet—or do they have him right where they want him?

After that scene, we see Dr. Dax and Dr. Arkham at Arkham Asylum talking about their “new patient”: Dick Grayson aka Nightwing. Nightwing is seriously screwed unless he can figure a way out of the mess he’s in, or if someone doesn’t come for him soon. The Club’s henchmen come and start beating Dr. Arkham as Dax tells him that the facility now belongs to the Black Glove.

Finally, we see two factors—chemical-stained (I’m guessing) red and black roses—in the Black Glove’s plan to destroy Batman; Jezebel Jet captive but still kicking; the Joker waiting for Batman’s arrival; and the Batman of Zur-En-Arrh himself running through the streets.

Whew! So overall, what do I think of this issue? It’s downright choppy. It jumps from scene-to-scene in a highly disorganized manner, dragging characters along with it and leaving the reader confused and exhausted. It’s not that we can’t understand what’s going on in “RIP”—at least the things Morrison is letting us piece together, anyway—it’s just that it’s poorly composed. Even the “RIP” tie-ins aren’t this bad.

Personally, I think Grant Morrison has some fantastic ideas in “RIP,” but the problem is his writing is just not up to par, so this story is coming through as a mess. Readers shouldn’t have to do research to keep track of what’s going on and what references are being made in a story, but that’s what Grant is forcing us to do. Reading a single comic shouldn’t be a chore—it should be enjoyable.

Hell yes this is an interesting story, and as every main and satellite issue comes out we find out a little more about it—but not enough that it’s making any sense as a well-constructed storyline. I think at the end of the arc it’s going to wrap up to be very intriguing (and not to mention the art by Tony Daniel is fantastic). But when it’s over will it be something we look back at and marvel? No way. The writing is just not fluid enough, and it’s almost like Morrison is giving us too much and too little all at once, if that makes any sense. (And no, that’s not a good thing.)

Do you need to pick this issue up? Not really. Go ahead and skip it. You might as well just buy the whole friggin’ arc when it comes out in trades if you really want to (and if it turns out to be worth it).

I’m tagging along for the ride—and it’s one hell of a ride—but I’m not thrilled yet. Let’s just hope Grant redeems himself by the end of this arc …

Man, I think I need a nap now (and maybe cry a little … just kidding). See you next month for Batman #680! (Sigh.)

// Remember! You do not have to register in order to post comments!

// Subscribe //

Rate This Issue:

(1 votes, average: 3 out of 5)

 Loading ...